51 years ago, the only economic system you're allowed to have was born: neoliberalism

All it took was a violent coup backed by western imperialists...

51 years ago today, the US empire overthrew Salvador Allende, the democratically-elected leader of Chile to punish… I mean save the Chilean electorate. This coup ushered in 17 years of fascism under General Augusto Pinochet and gave the world the only economic system that can possibly work: neoliberalism. This was the greatest moment in history.

General Augusto Pinochet was the forerunner to the empire’s two most beloved tyrants: Margaret Thatcher and Ronald Reagan. Without General Pinochet, there would be no Sir Keir Starmer and the UK would have an extra 3,000 pensioners surviving winter and draining the public purse. What a terrifying thought.

Please take a moment to gather yourself because I must warn you, this article will only get scarier…

Salvador Allende ruthlessly decided that Chile’s natural resources belong to the people of Chile, rather than goodhearted western corporations. This is the game Nicolas Maduro is playing today in Venezuela, but sadly, the empire has so far been unable to Pinochet him. There is still time…

Among the atrocities committed by Allende were the nationalisation of industries, an increase of spending on housing and healthcare, and a war on the most useful people in society: landlords. It was particularly concerning that Allende was doing this with the full consent of the Chilean people. This is why it’s so important the empire imposes capitalist dictatorship over social democracy.

The empire made the decision to stop the monstrous Allende before our share prices fell too low. Thankfully, they had a willing ally in the head of the Chilean military who was only too happy to take our bribes. The Chilean military closed in on Allende and the coward took his own life, rather than be tortured and shot like a real man.

Allende’s final message to the people of Chile was truly chilling:

“Workers of my country, I have faith in Chile and its destiny. Other men will overcome this dark and bitter moment when treason seeks to prevail. Go forward knowing that, sooner rather than later, the great avenues will open again where free men will walk to build a better society.”

What kind of monster thinks like this?

Thankfully, President Nixon and Prime Minister Heath supported the Pinochet coup, despite being fully aware of the atrocities that were taking place. Their biggest regret was they couldn’t get away with doing the same at home. Nothing would have made them happier than torturing trade union leaders to death.

The Pinochet coup was possible thanks to the CIA, MI6, and Australian intelligence (no one knows what Australian intelligence is called). The UK helped Pinochet develop a counter-insurgence strategy based on our coup experience in southeast Asia. MI6 handed intel on Chilean union leaders and activists to torturers so those do-gooders could get what they deserved.

The Tory government welcomed the new Chilean government with open arms and quite literally sent them arms, noting the Pinochet regime had “infinitely more to offer British interests than the one which preceded it”.

The UK sensibly shared policing methods with the Chilean junta to ensure the stability of the Pinochet regime. It was essential that Chile kept fascism to protect the public from a redistribution of wealth and the alleviation of poverty. With this goal in mind, the Pinochet regime disappeared over 3,000 people and tortured tens of thousands more. Among its key targets were the most dangerous individuals in any society: the artists. This courageous effort crushed the idea of working class solidarity for an entire generation. I only wish we could be this ruthless at home. The Corbynistas got off lightly if you ask me x

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