Archbishop confirms standing near Corbyn is worse than genocide

You have no idea what horrors the jam maker was planning

The UK’s top scoring Christian, Archbishop Justin Welby, has refused to meet with a pastor from Bethlehem called Munther Isaac because he spoke with Jeremy Corbyn at a pro-Palestinian rally.

As we all know, it’s unacceptable for Palestinians to attend pro-Palestinian rallies while their people are being genocided. Showing support for your people who are being blown to pieces by bombs is just about the most racist thing you can do. The only thing more racist is objecting to the people who are dropping the bombs. It’s so insensitive, I don’t have the words.

I don’t know if the Church of England can ex-communicate Palestinian pastors, but if it can, it definitely should. Personally, I wouldn’t let Palestinians become Christians in the first place to save us from all this hassle. I’m sure Jesus would agree with this idea.

Pastor Isaac recently caused controversy when he said that if Jesus were born today, he would have been born under rubble. This is perfectly true, but it’s against the rules to tell the truth, if the truth makes Israel look bad. Thankfully, Isaac resisted pointing out the IDF would have shot the three wise men and accused them of being Hamas for carrying gifts.

The archbishop would like you to know he is hugely concerned about the rise in anti-Semitism (objection to the Israeli government), and if he met with Isaac, it would mean more people might object to the Israeli government.

In other words, this was a kind-hearted gesture to shield Benjamin Netanyahu from criticism, not dissimilar to how Sir Keir Starmer took the “collective punishment” words out of the latest ceasefire motion. The most important thing here is not saving lives, it’s saving the reputations of war criminals. Jeremy Corbyn and Munther Isaac don’t understand this, which is why they are on the wrong side of history.

The only reasonable way to call for peace is to call for a “sustainable ceasefire” when the IDF has exterminated Hamas. It would be outrageous to suggest Hamas bomb civilians until the IDF were eliminated, but the IDF can bomb Palestinian civilians until Hamas is eliminated because that is what God wants. Just read the story of Amalek and it will help you understand.

Justin Welby explained a meeting with Munther Isaac would have caused problems with the Jewish community, but the Palestinian community have no political leverage and their screams of agony can easily be ignored.

Pastor Isaac said:

“The small Christian community in Gaza has discovered what is hell on earth. Most of them have lost their homes: 45 destroyed completely and 55 partially destroyed. There is no life left for them. This war will most likely bring an end to Christian life in Gaza. Everyone wants to leave.

“It is so painful for us to see the Christian church turn a blind eye to what is happening, offering words of concern and compassion, but for so long they have been silent in the face of obvious war crimes. Churches seem paralysed, and they seem willing to sacrifice the Christian presence in Palestine for the sake of avoiding controversy and not criticising Israel.”

The archbishop thanked the pastor for understanding his reasons for not giving a shit.

If the Palestinian refugee called Jesus were alive today, he would oppose any support for Palestinians and would be disgusted by calls for peace. As the New Testament tells us, Jesus was a man of war and he never broke bread with those who were shunned by polite society.

The message of Jesus was that you should burn bridges with those whose political views you dislike, but you should definitely side with warmongers like Benjamin Netanyahu.

Incidentally, Justin Welby has been perfectly comfortable standing on a stage with Benjamin Netanyahu and shaking his hand, but he would rather shake hands with a leper who’d just gone to the toilet without washing his hands than shake the hand of Pastor Isaac.

Genocide is not a red line for Justin Welby, but standing near Jeremy Corbyn without screaming “anti-Semitic bastard!” is. This is why Justin Welby might be the greatest Archbishop of Canterbury we’ve ever seen. No one follows the example of Jesus better.

For example, the Bible tells us how Jesus loved his enemies by feeding them, teaching them and showing compassion towards them, even when he knew they would kill him.

We must therefore assume that Jeremy Corbyn was going to do something even worse than assassinate Justin Welby. I hear the monster was going to invite him to his allotment to try out some jam and read some anti-war poetry. It doesn’t bear thinking about x

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