Gary Lineker condemned for calling for peace

It's feared messages of peace could ruin Armistice Day

Unhinged terror supporter Gary Lineker has come under fire for implying it would be better if civilians in Israel and Palestine stop being blown to pieces. Obviously, everyone agrees that Israelis should not be blown to pieces; the controversial part of Lineker’s suggestion is that Palestinians should also not be blown to pieces.

If Lineker had called for a one-way peace, that would've been fine with the pro-genocide brigade, but he didn’t. He called for a two-way peace, suggesting he thinks Palestinians have some value and their children should remain intact.

As you can imagine, Lineker’s words have been met with sheer disgust so brace yourself for his hate-filled nonsense…

Lineker quote-tweeted our pro-genocide home secretary Suella Braverman after she objected to “hate marchers” who plan to desecrate Armistice Day by calling for peace. Obviously, peace is not an appropriate message for Armistice Day, but Lineker disagrees. Well, he would, wouldn’t he?

“Marching and calling for a ceasefire and peace so more innocents don’t get killed is not really the definition of a hate march,” Lineker tweeted, and honestly, I don’t know how he hasn’t been visited by police.

Suella Braverman fumed: “It is entirely unacceptable to desecrate Armistice Day with a hate march through London. If it goes ahead, there is an obvious risk of serious public disorder, violence and damage, as well as giving offence to millions of decent British people.”

By “decent British people”, Suella obviously means the 8% of the public who don’t support a ceasefire. The 76% of the public who do support a ceasefire are not decent people and are not upset by the marches.

Andrew Percy, chair of the all-party parliamentary group on anti-Semitism, explained the marches “have made British Jews feel more unsafe in this country than they have for generations.”

As every decent person understands, these marches for peace are much scarier than Israel dropping 1.5 Hiroshima bombs on one of the most densely-populated places on earth.

Palestinians don’t know what fear is, but the pro-genocide brigade are shitting themselves because that real estate deal with Egypt for the Gaza strip might fall through. The coast of Gaza would be a lovely place to build a holiday home once the natives are cleared out and the smell of white phosphorous has dissipated.

“Why would you have a ceasefire with terrorists whose leaders have explicitly said they want to do October 7 again and again until Israel is annihilated?” Simon Shama tweeted in support of people who insist they won’t stop until Palestine is annihilated.

Compassionate bomb enthusiast Benjamin Netanyahu explained there won't be a humanitarian window until Israeli hostages are released. He accused Hamas of gunning down Palestinians, suggesting Hamas doesn’t give a shit about the humanitarian window, but Palestinian children must drink from puddles regardless. This makes total sense.

The BBC interviewed a random selection of the most right-wing 8% of the public today to hear the views of the only people who matter.

One furious commentator called Colin raged: “If Gary Lineker loves those Palestinian refugees so much, he should bloody well take them into his house!”

It was pointed out that Lineker has a history of housing refugees and would probably be happy to welcome Palestinians into his home. Colin was asked to clarify if he believes Palestinian refugees should be allowed into the UK so people like Lineker can help them.

“No, they should bloody well go back to where they came from!” Colin roared in a particularly erudite manner.

There was an awkward, terrifying pause as Colin realised he’d somehow checkmated himself, despite his calm and reasoned approach. His face turned gammon as it dawned his flawless logic had led to the kind of paradox that you would normally encounter in quantum physics. Colin was not smart enough to understand quantum physics so he ran away before he could be questioned further x

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