It's now terrorism to protest against arms manufacturers who blow up kids
It's also terrorism to give the impression you support the protesters
Arms manufacturers who blow up kids are delighted to hear that it is now officially TERRORISM to protest against them! Even better, it's terrorism to utter any words or wear any t-shirts or badges that might indicate your support for direct action. Truly, this is what the suffragettes and the civil rights movements fought for (heart emoji).
Head of the Ministry of Truth, Yvette Cooper, has ruled that you can't even mention the name of any direct action group that she has memory-holed. Splashing paint is now considered equivalent to flying planes into buildings because it's important for the law to be consistent.
Splashers, who have killed a staggering zero people and injured a sickening zero more, have been terrorising buildings owned by companies with body counts in the millions. All I can say is thank god Yvette Cooper is protecting the arms manufacturers! History will remember her kindly because any dissenting opinion will be memory-holed.
The memory-holing of a group that shall not be named went into effect last night after its courrt appeal was rejected. Its Twitter account has already been nuked, everyone who liked its posts has been arrested, and all of its members have been thrown into a meat grinder. I mean they, um, never existed. What are you talking about? What members? What ban? Shut up, you thought criminal, I'm reporting you!
Anyone who discusses the group that never existed shall be taken to Room 101 for, um, reprogramming. If they are lucky, they will return to society after 14 years as broken husks to remind the nation what happens to thought criminals. If their reprogramming is unsuccessful, well, they never existed.
When the Terrorism Act was established, it was stated in parliament that it would not be used to ban non-violent direct action groups, but everyone has forgot about that now. Just ignore all that nonsense you were taught about the spirit of the law. No one cares.
Yvette Cooper, who was coincidentally paid £215,00 by Israel last year, says next on her proscription list is people who wave Palestinian flags. Let's be honest, they deserve it, don't they? Even naming the country Israel is bombing will be a hate crime because Israel isn't bombing anyone. What are you talking about? Don't even think of wearing a watermelon badge or Yvette Cooper will break your legs!
You would think everyone is now so scared of Yvette Cooper that they wouldn't dare undermine her authority, but horrifyingly, a replacement for the group that shall not be named has been set up. Even worse, the new group is called Yvette Cooper. This leaves poor Yvette in the difficult position where she will have to proscribe herself. It's unclear if Yvette will be sent to Room 101, she is very confused x
Thank you so much for reading my outstanding journalism! If you enjoyed this article, you can buy me a coffee below or simply share this article with a friend. Your support is hugely appreciated x
This is so Orwellian , we are terrorist for wanting the Genocide of the Palestinian people to stop 🇵🇸❤️🩹💪🏽
I have a suggestion to make: those of us who support the actions and intentions of Palestine Action should express our support for them publicly, perhaps a public petition, a show of solidarity of some kind; challenge the government to arrest all of us? Labelling Palestine Action as a terrorist organisation is the act of a fascist government!