UK's foremost anti-racist Laurence Fox to offer anti-racism classes

He is the true hero of our time

The UK’s foremost anti-racist Laurence Fox is to offer anti-racism classes after becoming disillusioned with woke Britain following a high-profile court case that he somehow lost. It’s fair to say the judge’s verdict was the biggest shock since Laurence failed to become London Mayor, despite taking his guitar onto BBC Question Time.

Laurence was being sued by two people who he called “paedophiles” because they ratioed him when he got angry at Black History Month. Laurence was so angry that he boycotted Sainsbury’s because it “promoted racial segregation and discrimination” by supporting Black History Month.

As everyone knows, black people are desperate to bring back segregation and white people would be the victims of this. Laurence’s brave stance may have saved the overwhelming majority of the population from this fiendish plot.

Sainsbury’s tweeted that they didn’t want any racists in their stores and this must have upset the Reclaim Party because their spokesperson (Laurence’s only mate) said: “It does seem a departure for big retail to be laying down moral strictures to its customers. Go woke, go broke.” This is interesting because I’m pretty sure Laurence has not gone woke and yet here he is…

Following Laurence’s announcement that he would not be setting foot in Sainsbury’s, the supermarket’s profits increased by 17% and they sent him a bouquet of flowers as a thank you. Laurence erupted in fury at the gesture and blocked them on Twitter because he thought they were calling him a girl. He then spent three days yelling: “I’m not a girl!” at anyone who’ll listen.

Not only did Laurence lose his court case against the people he baselessly called “paedophiles”, he lost his attempt to counter-sue them for calling him “racist” after the judge decided this did not harm his reputation.

Laurence was disgusted with the judge who clearly did not understand racism or its impacts on society like he does. The UK’s biggest victim of black-on-white racism explained it’s a “career-ending word and a reputation-destroying allegation”, but he failed to consider that’s irrelevant if you don’t have a career or a reputation.

Laurence blamed his opponents for the downfall of his acting career and his divorce from Billie Piper, rather than the fact he can’t act and has spent the last five years yelling “What is a racist?” at everyone who walks past, including a five-year-old girl who he made cry.

In an attempt to help the judge understand what a racist is, Laurence performed the Haka in court not once but twice, explained it was terrible for footballers to take the knee to protest against racism, and articulated how “It’s okay to say ‘I hate black people’ if I’ve just been gang raped by a bunch of Ugandans”. I will never understand how the judge didn’t find in his favour.

As a result of his defeat, Laurence could be forced to pay out £3 million. This is worrying because I’m almost certain he’s on Universal Credit, given that absolutely no one will employ him. Laurence was even sacked by GB News when it became so woke it objected to him objectifying Ava Santina-Evans, saying “Who would want to bang that?”, even though she was clearly out of his league.

Thankfully, Laurence is in a strong position to bounce back, given he is an excellent busker and has 12 paying members on his Patreon. I’m one of those paying members by the way. I love his music as much as you love his politics x

---

Thank you so much for letting me vent! If you enjoyed this article, you can buy me a coffee below or simply share this article with a friend. It helps me more than you realise x