94 Comments
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Amine's avatar

I am now convinced that Mileikowsky will do whatever he can to avoid prison, even if Isra-HELL must be completely destroyed, all hostages killed, ...

Mileikowsky FIRST and "aprรจs moi, le dรฉluge"

Res Nullius's avatar

He's a symptom rather than the cause. It's appealing to believe that our impasse is created by just one evil guy, because then we can imagine him being assassinated and our problems disappearing. If he were to be destroyed, however, the Machine would simply suck another equally vile sociopath into his niche.

Them is Us.

Res Nullius's avatar

Having said that, I must admit it would be karmically satisfying if he were to be crushed in his bunker under collapsing concrete, to meet the same slow, thirsty, excruciating, claustrophobic, dark demise to which he has doomed thousands of Gazans.

Rebel Nun's avatar

Yep. The fear that briefly flashed through our guts while reading this is what Gazans have lived, and died, with constantly for a year. And longer.

Res Nullius's avatar

I feel as you do. And I can't avoid thinking not only of the Palestinians, but also the Lebanese, the Yemenis, the Syrians, the Libyans, the Iraqis, the Afghans, the list going on and on over centuries, over the whole planet. The tension between our sociable human instincts and the unchecked relentless cruelty to which we bear witness is driving to insanity even those who aren't under direct assault.

I have seen people commenting that all our talking here achieves nothing, no useful action to bring about justice. I think, though, that at least it means we're not alone in this anguish. With that we can help each other to not look away, to have the resolve to continue to bear witness.

Shelley Chadwick's avatar

If ever the UN or ICJ get too close he'll just hop on the Wings of Zion, fly direct to Washinton DC and claim political asylum.

They'll find him a nice island resort somewhere in the Carribean where he can kick back and write his memoirs. I heard Mein Kamf was a pretty big seller back in the day. LOL

Fadi Lama's avatar

Simply hilarious from start to end! Special quotes:

"President Blinken and Prime Minister Mileikowsky

"With any luck, the immigrant communities will go with them. Nigel Farage will be wanking so fucking hard."

Baz's avatar

Although I liked the thrust of your comment Fadi having to read the Farage quote again has caused me great cerebral turbulence.

Tardigrade's avatar

Turbulence, or turgidity?

Baz's avatar

Your comment has disturbed my sleep patterns

Hilary Minor's avatar

Dear Normal Island News - I've had your last article taken down from Facebook as "spam". I can't think why . . . I'm going to have another go with this one. Thank you for your faultless, incisive, journalism :-)

Normal Island News's avatar

Facebook doesn't want the world to see my amazing journalism x

Hilary Minor's avatar

I'll just keep promoting it :-)

Baz's avatar

It also doesnโ€™t want the world to see its advertisers suddenly have a moral backbone.

Tardigrade's avatar

I just posted it with this preface.

"Dear Facebook: before you remove this post, please be aware that it is SATIRE. Zuck recently wrote to Congress and among other things said that he regretted censoring SATIRE."

We'll see what happens.

Tardigrade's avatar

It's still up! Amazing!

ab's avatar

You're a fucking legend.

Tony Jackson's avatar

As I explained in a previous stack comment, Hezbollah have initiated a totally unilateral strike against the US mainland. This disgaraceful use of their weapon, known as a MIlton, is due to hit civilian infrastructure in the next few hours.

Fucking bastards!

Frances Leader's avatar

Oh I didn't know Milton belonged to Hezbollah! That makes perfect sense! ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ™„

Hetty in Scotchland ;-)'s avatar

Is it named after Milton's 'paradise lost'? Crikey.

Tardigrade's avatar

I await its arrival with bated breath.

Prince Kuduโ€™Ra's avatar

โ€œThis isnโ€™t randomโ€ฆ Someone made a mistake. A big goddamned mistake.โ€

Zuzana's avatar

Where all the reasoning fails the sarcasm steps in. And in it youโ€™ll find all the facts the experts are screaming about but the decision makers decided not to hear (because they know better, obviously. And are for sure having better bunkers). How I wish I could just stay laughing at this article without realizing how horribly true all in it is (maybe except of mutant zombies. But who knows, nowadays ๐ŸงŸโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ).

Kali Prajita's avatar

Both terrifying and hilarious. The two ingredients of great satire. I laughed and cried simultaneously!

Leo Grinner's avatar

After reading carefully I`ve decided to open the booze and start dancing...

Geoffrey Deihl's avatar

Thanks for the gallows humor. Completely appropriate for the farcical situation, the penultimate creation in our own opinion quickly on the way to hell.

Jim Twiss's avatar

In my personal opinion this is your best journalism ever, very well done ๐Ÿ‘ ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘

Victor's avatar

Frighteningly good ๐Ÿ‘

JA Thueson's avatar

And in the dim glow of post war euphoria we can grind and roll our indoor grow of cave weed as we watch munch on microgreens to digital sunrises and sets in our batcaves and dance to the compressed digital sound of the Grateful Dead

Martina Lauer's avatar

Really explains the thinking of our leaders. And I see you have noticed the current version of Count Dracula too.

Res Nullius's avatar

It's so apt, we all know who it is without explanation.

Dickdastadly's avatar

What about Armageddon? I dont now much about biblical prophesy but isnt Jesus supposed to come back and save all the righteous? All the evangelical Christians in America are going to be saved right? is that because like Jesus they are all white? Are there any evangelical Jews? Will they be saved? At least being a Brit and sitting on our little island we can ignore all this and just cheer on our team to win the footie on Sunday.

Margaret Altink's avatar

How lovely to not have to be politically correct! I envy you for speaking out. I started my life speaking out what I thought, but unfortunately, the hubby's job was a stake.............and as he worked for an AMERICAN firm, God forbid one spoke the truth! American's are expert at political correctness!