44 Comments
User's avatar
Filipe Lopes's avatar

Oh yes he saved them…. a lot. Some of them, he “saved” multiple times I hear.

Dillon's avatar

He’s such a hero he purchased his wife from the island

David Beacham's avatar

My friend did that once with a chicken that was facing the chop - he woke up the next day with a strange animal on his pillow he only had a vague memory of. Is that the same sort of thing? 🐓 🤔

Lisa's avatar

Thanks for the update Laura, I was just about to jump to the wrong conclusion and think he had been there for other less selfless reasons... phew!

Ohio Barbarian's avatar

Bloody brilliant satire. The problem is somebody like Ben Shapiro might just take this and run with it because they are oblivious to satire.

Yvette Worrall's avatar

Impeccable logic. And impeccable is related to the Latin verb, to sin, peccare.

So your logic never went down the wrong path. Well done for bringing our wayward reasonings back onto the straight and narrow. Bone spur boy? The boner boy?

Well he might have the odd - peccadillo - but is fundamentally an upright man, an honourable man, (as Marc Anthony repeatedly declared Brutus, the stabber, to be...).

Mary's avatar

If he told people they wouldn't have believed it. There's never been anything like it, it's so incredible. Nobody else did anything. He was the only one who could.

Jennifer Akdemir's avatar

.......from being raped by anyone other than him?

Patricia O’Keefe's avatar

At her finest, Laura keep it up

Mike's avatar

You spelt screwed wrong…😂 great work as always!

Mud Stained Meditations's avatar

Your articles are refreshing as well as i fomrative and help me process these things by laughing from a distance rather than drowning in the sh*t. Thank you.

Nooooooooowayyyyyyyyy's avatar

You can stop sending that fucker $15 now!

With this humble admission St Peter will have the pearly gates wide open for him now.

And Nobel committee will convinced 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Panjandrum's avatar

"Epstein’s victims keep dying in unusual circumstances," -- oh and "timely" deaths too.

https://thehill.com/regulation/court-battles/5415338-epstein-attorney-roy-black-dies/

Laurent A. Lambert's avatar

Of course.

Trump has always been such a white knight for all women…

laura oshea's avatar

Liar liar pants on fire!!!!

Steve O’Cally's avatar

It was all in a coded message from MI-7 released about Trump – known as Agent “**Jethro Tull**” in *Project Aqualung*. It was all corroborated RIGHT THERE.

Jim M.'s avatar

This has to be one of the most hilarious claims I have ever heard. 🤣 And he did it without fanfare or expecting anything in return. 🤣🤣 He did it for the girls.