Israel has every right to defend itself from aid ships
Everyone knows international waters belong to Israel
World leaders have refused to condemn Israel for bombing a ship in international waters because that sort of thing is only bad when the Houthis do it.
The Conscience, an aid ship that belongs to the Freedom Flotilla Coalition, was struck by drones off the coast of Malta, just 1,200 miles from Israel.
It’s understood Israel was following the controversial “We can bomb whoever the fuck we want” directive. The same directive is likely to be employed against any western leader who speaks out against the attack.
The Freedom Flotilla Coalition acted after the World Food Programme and UNRWA ran out of food stocks because Israel has not allowed supplies into Gaza since 2 March. You will be reassured to hear our leaders are siding with the people who are starving civilians to death.
The Conscience was about to be boarded by wanted terrorist Greta Thunberg who planned to arm Palestinians with food, so you can imagine how disappointed Israel was that it didn’t wait a few hours.
Israel’s drones targeted the ship’s generator to leave it ablaze and powerless, a strategy the world’s most moral army usually employs against hospitals. Thirty aid workers were left stranded in the sea for 10 hours because no one wanted to come to their rescue in case Israel bombed them too.
Israel has a proud track record of bombing aid ships - it did so in 2010 when it managed to kill nine aid workers, and here was you thinking Israel only specialises in bombing schools, hospitals and tents.
Technically, bombing a ship in international waters is a declaration of war against the country the ship belongs to, but given the US was too scared to do anything when Israel bombed the USS Liberty, I can’t imagine Palau doing anything, can you?
When news of the attack broke, a public outcry prompted Israel’s supporters to either pretend it never happened, or argue that Israel did not have the capability to carry out the attack, so Yemen must have done it to make Israel look bad. Surprisingly, neither line worked so everyone just gave up denying it and acted like the attack was no biggie.
Anything Israel does is automatically right according to the antisemitism guidelines that we’re skilfully using to make you lot shut the fuck up. Why aren't you shutting the fuck up?
In an outrageous act of antisemitism, the Freedom Flotilla Coalition called for Israel to be held accountable for this latest breach of international law. Israel has said it is investigating reports of the attack and looks forward to explaining why its actions were necessary.
All you need to know is that when the Houthis bomb ships, it’s to stop them supplying an army that’s committing genocide, whereas when Israel bombs ships, it’s to stop aid workers feeding starving people.
As you can see, the Houthis are much, much worse than the IDF. No wonder the Royal Navy has been bombing Yemen for Israel x
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Your exquisitely satirical take brings the very lightest relief to the whole fucked up ongoing genocide. Please 🙏 continue.
Thank you Laura for this column. I detest Israel and Zionism and I am enraged and ashamed that America is paying for the weapons that Israel is using to starve the Palestinians and murder children living in tents. I am an American protester and expect murderous attacks here soon.