58 Comments
User's avatar
Steffen  Gorgas's avatar

There is only one country in the world that is allowed to infiltrate our establishment, actually control our foreign policy, even if it breaks international law! But we don’t mention them here. I could be mistaken as a terrorist sympathiser and be thrown in jail over Christmas.

Steffen  Gorgas's avatar

I condemn any form of terrorism, irrespective of who wages it. Do I accept my government’s definition of a terrorist organisation? Certainly not. Do I support the rights of the oppressed to resist their oppressor? Certainly yes. All in accordance with international law, which is not so easily corrupted by vested interests.

Jennifer Akdemir's avatar

Indeed. I was trying to be ironic!

Baz's avatar

Ironic? You’ll be using satire next - I suspect you probably commit thought crimes too.

Maria Fuencisla de Felipe's avatar

I take that’s a pre condition to speak out about anything. It’s sad and ridiculous at the same time, when you try to stand against a genocide, there is almost always anyone asking if you condemn Hamas. Like the genocide is legitimated.

Jennifer Akdemir's avatar

Also the way the mass media put the burden of proof on anyone who tries to defend the Palestinians, while they cheer along a country armed to the teeth by the most powerful nation on earth.

G S's avatar

Stupid question in this context, even more so with every letter in caps.

Rayya Ghul's avatar

Err …. Sense of humour failure? It was clearly meant ironically.

nancy knox-bierman's avatar

WHY DO YOU WRITE IN CAPS???

lol. Are you trying to digitally yell like Helen Keller?

Rebel Nun's avatar

Jennifer was writing in caps because that question is usually yelled. (Because the people who ask it are usually asshats).

nancy knox-bierman's avatar

lol...they usually are, aren't they?

Svend Nielsen's avatar

If I don't pay attention I sometimes WRITE IN CAPS, because the grandkids need my laptop for school work!

Persephone's avatar

There are two. Don't forget, the USA and Israel are technically different countries. Special relationship and all that. Special used to be slang for retarded back when I was a child, BTW.

Karl Drinkwater's avatar

Fascinating how Israel is allowed to fund and manipulate without being called out by UK and US politicians.

Jennifer Akdemir's avatar

Ah, but they're our friends (Establishment speak for "protect our financial interests")..

Francis/Clare's avatar

They effing own us, that's why. It is truly astounding.

Philippa Rees's avatar

Nobody has drawn attention to the Royal's new universal deterrent. They keep Andrew, as others do rat poison, in a dark cupboard the dogs can't get to. Then, when noises off are detected, they sprinkle him about. He detracts attention from other malodourous noisy stories. Corgis and Christmas are protected.

Evil Harry's avatar

We always had the one in the military that we called a bullet magnet.

You wanted one in the troop as any shit was headed his way, not yours.

A bit like the logic of Baldricks bullet.

Philippa Rees's avatar

I've never heard of Baldrick's bullet. One to remember!

Evil Harry's avatar

In the last Blackadder series, set in the trenches, Baldrick carved his own name on a bullet, as he was told that "somewhere there's a bullet with your name on it".

So if he already owned that bullet, he was safe from being shot.

Philippa Rees's avatar

Thanks. A story with wider implications! I must find ways to re-deploy them!

Ohio Barbarian's avatar

I just want to know what that Chinese spy did that was so terrible the Chinese government assigned him to Prince Andrew.

Jennifer Akdemir's avatar

Brilliant!! :))))

roger hawcroft's avatar

As always, direct, pertinent and insightful. You never let us down ... I will you the holiday season you would wish for yourself and yours and thank you for your inimitable satire ... Take care. Stay safe.

Anna's avatar

Your writing brings me much joy.

Frances Kay's avatar

What a refreshing blast of satire to consume along with my breakfast. Laura, you are a tonic. Thank you so much and Happy Christmas!

Steve's avatar

I always understood that in the UK, a ‘nonce’ is someone who has sexually assaulted children. Am sure that is the case.

A. Nonymous's avatar

Best one I've seen so far Laura, albeit a bit disconcerting.

Around here a 'nonce' is a prisoner who rapes other prisoners (as per Ronnie Kray), though I guess a Royal who rapes sex slaves would qualify.

Emma's avatar

Well, you learn something new everyday ☺️

Jane D's avatar

Priceless commentary, Laura. 😂

Givenroom's avatar

I’m in trouble now, my eldest son married to a Chinese, and her best friend Ukrainian and her family lives in Moskou. How many spies, double agents and enemies are there in the bed(s) what I used to call my family?

Leo Grinner's avatar

Sad story, just when the Prince had found his Ying they took his Yang away... right before Xmass

Jo Waller's avatar

Yeah there was talk of China having nukes the other day attempting to boost funding for the UK's armed forces, if we have any, and maybe update our leaky nuclear war head. We are definitely being fed Sinophobia by the US in prep for sanctions on China that will destroy us.

What genius to use the hated Prince. https://jowaller.substack.com/p/sinophobia-in-the-british-msm-continues

janoskar.hansen@gmail.com's avatar

That's a wonderful irony, poor Andrew once he was popular people loved him

and now he can't even have a Chinese friend