Tributes pour in as Ghislaine Maxwell sadly passes away tomorrow

Ghislaine Maxwell has tragically taken her own life tomorrow night, hours before she was scheduled to testify to congress about the Epstein files. It is understood Maxwell committed suicide due to doubts she would blame everything on Russia.

At the time of the suicide, the cameras to Maxwell’s cell were switched off and the guards were sleeping. This has sparked online conspiracy theories, suggesting Maxwell did not kill herself. These conspiracy theories are deeply insensitive, considering Maxwell’s friends are pretending to be in mourning.

One of Maxwell’s closest friends, Alan Dershowitz, said: “I’m extremely relieved, I mean saddened to hear about Ghislaine’s death. I worked with her for many years and can assure you our interactions were entirely above board. I should probably, um, stop talking now...”

President Trump joined in the tributes, saying he is “shocked and saddened” by Maxwell’s unexpected death, praising the “incredible beauty pageants she helped me arrange”. The president added: “She had so much to live for. I’d got her moved to a nicer cell and was even weighing up pardoning her and now this...”

Peter Mandelson broke his silence to say: “Ghislaine’s passing is a heavy blow, but I will cherish the memories of the times we spent together in our underwear.”

Prince Andrew touchingly said: “First Virginia and now Ghislaine. This is hard to take. Ghislaine was one of the only women who didn’t recoil in revulsion around me. I will always appreciate that. At least she’s with Jeffrey now in Tel Aviv, I mean, um, heaven...”

All of the friends who paid tribute to Maxwell were struggling to hold back smiles as their eyes shifted from side to side. Conspiracy theorists are suggesting they were relieved because she might have said something incriminating about them. Personally, I put their reactions down to the first stage of grief, known as “Do you think we got away with it?”

Ghislaine Maxwell was the daughter of a Mossad spy who sadly fell off his yacht after blackmailing his bosses. Maxwell was in a relationship with fellow paedophile Jeffrey Epstein for 25 years. During that time, the couple befriended many politicians who seemed awfully keen to do their bidding for some reason. Ghislaine’s high-flying lifestyle came to an abrupt end when she was unfairly imprisoned for doing what every other rich person does.

At the time of her passing, Maxwell was serving a controversial 20-year prison sentence, after being convicted of being a paedophile and trafficking women and children to no one. As a result of the unusually harsh sentence for a rich person, she was strongly supported by President Trump who was known to have formed a close bond with Maxwell and her girls.

It’s fair to say Maxwell’s passing has sent shockwaves through the political world. She leaves behind hundreds of traumatised victims and hundreds of relieved perverts.

---

Thank you so much for reading my outstanding journalism! If you enjoyed this article, you can buy me a coffee below or simply share this article with a friend. Your support is hugely appreciated x