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Trump declares Venezuela "liberated" now that it is sending oil to Israel
President Trump has announced that Venezuela has been “liberated” now that it is sending oil to Israel.
Feb 11
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The FBI's fuck ups are making it really hard to pretend that Epstein is dead
There is now enough weirdness around Epstein that even sensible journalists like me are saying he allegedly took his life.
Feb 9
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British Prime Minister Morgan McSweeney resigns due to Epstein files
British prime minister Morgan McSweeney has resigned due to the revelations about Peter Mandelson in the Epstein files - the biggest scandal since…
Feb 8
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Operation Epstein Distraction finds miracle cures for every illness!
You can’t have failed to notice the number of miracle cures that have appeared over the last few days.
Feb 8
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Tributes pour in as Ghislaine Maxwell sadly passes away tomorrow
Ghislaine Maxwell has tragically taken her own life tomorrow night, hours before she was scheduled to testify to congress about the Epstein files.
Feb 7
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I don't wish to upset you, but Epstein could bring down the British prime minister
It’s been a strange couple of days for me.
Feb 6
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If you thought the Epstein stuff was weird, you have seen nothing yet
Now you’re gonna think I’m making this story up, but you should know I don’t write satire anymore and this one is 100% factual, like everything I write…
Feb 3
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Peter Mandelson has been a very naughty boy
You will be distraught to hear that your favourite Lord since Voldemort, Peter Mandelson, has found himself in a spot of bother in the Epstein files.
Feb 2
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Elon is so weird that he was even rejected by the paedophiles at Epstein Island
You probably thought nothing could be worse than being a paedophile who owns dungeons and Satanic temples and a private rape island and abducts girls…
Feb 1
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January 2026
Trump condemns Iran for placing its country among US military bases
President Trump has condemned Iran for an unprovoked act of aggression that has raised the terrifying prospect of all-out war in the Middle East.
Jan 30
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Americans beg Iran to intervene as death toll in Minneapolis reaches 80,000
The desperate American people have pleaded with the Ayatollah of Iran to intervene after the death toll in Minneapolis reached 80,000.
Jan 25
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2026: the year the World Economic Forum admitted that every conspiracy theory is real...
I expect you are distraught this year’s World Economic Forum has come to an end, and once again, you missed out because you didn’t get an invitation.
Jan 24
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