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Starmer spied on journalists for the same reason we need online age checks: to save the children!
Sir Keir Starmer has explained he hired an agency to spy on journalists and fabricate stories about them because it is the only way to keep children…
7 hrs ago
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Ghislaine Maxwell demonstrates remarkable ability to shapeshift
When Ghislaine Maxwell spoke at a recent hearing in the US, conspiracy theorists claimed it was not Ghislaine Maxwell, just because it looked nothing…
Feb 16
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We might finally have a distraction big enough to deflect from the Epstein files: aliens
Since the emergence of social media, the public has become “ungovernable” because the horrifying truth is too much for them.
Feb 15
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Little Tommy Robinson is now a refugee after fleeing UK
The UK’s favourite pint-sized fascist, Tommy Robinson, has announced that he now self-identifies as a refugee.
Feb 14
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Queen Elizabeth loaned £7 million to paedophile connected to sex trafficking ring
It has been revealed the late Queen Elizabeth II loaned £7 million to a paedophile who was linked to a sex trafficking ring.
Feb 13
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Trump declares Venezuela "liberated" now that it is sending oil to Israel
President Trump has announced that Venezuela has been “liberated” now that it is sending oil to Israel.
Feb 11
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The FBI's fuck ups are making it really hard to pretend that Epstein is dead
There is now enough weirdness around Epstein that even sensible journalists like me are saying he allegedly took his life.
Feb 9
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British Prime Minister Morgan McSweeney resigns due to Epstein files
British prime minister Morgan McSweeney has resigned due to the revelations about Peter Mandelson in the Epstein files - the biggest scandal since…
Feb 8
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Operation Epstein Distraction finds miracle cures for every illness!
You can’t have failed to notice the number of miracle cures that have appeared over the last few days.
Feb 8
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Tributes pour in as Ghislaine Maxwell sadly passes away tomorrow
Ghislaine Maxwell has tragically taken her own life tomorrow night, hours before she was scheduled to testify to congress about the Epstein files.
Feb 7
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I don't wish to upset you, but Epstein could bring down the British prime minister
It’s been a strange couple of days for me.
Feb 6
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If you thought the Epstein stuff was weird, you have seen nothing yet
Now you’re gonna think I’m making this story up, but you should know I don’t write satire anymore and this one is 100% factual, like everything I write…
Feb 3
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