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Suella Braverman demands former colonies pay reparations to London
Reform UK MP Suella Braverman has finally said what everyone is thinking: the victims of colonialism owe us big time.
Jul 5
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June 2026
The greatest prime minister since Liz Truss resigns
The greatest prime minister since Liz Truss has resigned and everyone in the country who matters is distraught.
Jun 22
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Elon Musk set to become the world's first trillionaire to be guillotined
This should cheer you up while you dig into a tin of cold beans and wonder how you’re gonna make rent: Elon Musk has become the world’s first…
Jun 14
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FIFA Peace Prize winner kicks off World Cup by bombing Iran's water supply
The greatest ever winner of the FIFA Peace Prize, Donald Trump, has kicked off the World Cup by bombing Iran’s water supply.
Jun 11
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May 2026
President Trump skips son's wedding to attend his latest staged assassination attempt
President Trump has explained that he was sadly unable to attend his son’s wedding in the Bahamas because the date clashed with his latest staged…
May 24
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Cuba invades United States to “Liberate the American People” and “Restore Democracy”
The Republic of Cuba has launched a ground invasion of the United States in its mission to free Americans from decades of tyranny, economic neglect, and…
May 22
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Proud day for Israel as the Epstein lobby defeats Thomas Massie in Kentucky primary
There were celebrations across Tel Aviv last night as AIPAC candidate Ed Gallrein defeated Thomas Massie in the Kentucky primary.
May 20
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Andy Burnham promises "real change" by delivering Starmer's policies with a Mancunian accent
In a move described by ThinkLabour as “totally above board,” Josh Simons has graciously stepped aside to let Andy Burnham contest his Makerfield seat in…
May 16
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Muslim socialist destroys New York by taxing the rich, eliminating the deficit and improving public services
Newly elected Mayor Zohran Mamdani—better known as Muslim al-Socialist to everyone who remembers what America used to be—has single-handedly ruined the…
May 14
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Man in silly outfit cheerfully announces new age of authoritarianism on behalf of prime minister everyone hates
Yesterday, an unelected man sat in the unelected House of Lords, wearing a silly hat and the skin of several small, furry animals that made him look…
May 13
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Conspiracy theorists insist aliens aren't real as President Trump releases UFO files
For months, I’ve been telling you lot that UFO disclosure is coming.
May 9
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Keir Starmer stunned to discover local elections were held yesterday
A furious Sir Keir Starmer has demanded answers after hearing the news that local elections were held yesterday, despite his personal decision to…
May 8
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